Autism Awareness Day 6

Autism Awareness Day 6 - Therapy alone is not enough. One thing that Dr. Soloman told us when our boys were diagnosed was that we needed to record our therapy sessions. He said that we shouldn't rely on therapists, that we needed to learn how to do the therapy ourselves at home. Dr. Soloman said that we as parents were the key to helping our children meet their milestones and that a few hours a week with a therapist was never going to be enough. So we took his advise and recorded the first several sessions so that we could replay them and learn how to provide therapy at home.

At this point in time we no longer record therapy sessions but at the beginning it was very helpful. We still observe therapy sessions and partner with the boys therapists to keep up with what skills we need to work on. We've done our best to incorporate the things they do in therapy into our everyday lives. We are constantly working on skills at home but we've made it more a part of life rather than endless therapy sessions. The key to teaching our boys is through fun and play. They learn so much more when they enjoy it and I think that is really true for just about anyone.

We've taken a lot of the advice given to us from therapists and put it into play (literally play time) at home. We've also found some of our own methods that work too. I don't feel that we are the best at this but I will say that the therapists have always told us that they can tell we're working on things at home. So if you ask me that must mean we're doing something right. All I know is that our boys have come a long way since the beginning of this journey.

Autism Awareness Day 5

Autism Awareness Day 5- Consistency is key. When you have a child with Autism you soon learn that being consistent and maintaining schedules can be very helpful. My thoughts on this are that if your senses can be easily overwhelmed, the world around you can seem chaotic and overstimulating, and you have difficultly clearly communicating with others then schedules and routines probably help you to feel more comfortable and secure. I think for my boys it is nice for them to know what's expected and what's coming next so they feel safe and in balance.

It is for this reason that we have a pretty set bedtime routine and schedule. We try to keep therapy appointments on the same days and times. We use the "clean up" song to signal the boys that it's time to put toys away. (songs in general are good but I'll talk about that on another post) I usually do not take my boys to the doctor if their regular doctor is not scheduled in that day. We like to keep the same therapists and the one time that we did have to switch therapists for a bit we tried to get Gatlin used to the new one before his regular one went on maternity leave. Doing these things helps to keep it familiar and comfortable for our boys. They are less likely to be overwhelmed and frustrated if we stick to the routine.

Now I'm not saying that you should never change things up because let's face it, life is full of change. What I am saying is that you should keep things on schedule when you can and when you can't it's best to talk about it, show pictures, or do whatever you can to clue a child with Autism in on what changes are to come. For example one time we missed physical therapy for the week so then when we took Gatlin in for Speech he became very agitated because it wasn't the right therapist. He was expecting to see Miss Megan and not Miss Jessica. This actually just happened with Draiman also since he's no longer in OT.

I have noticed that the more Gatlin understands what I'm telling him the easier he handles changes. On the other hand with Draiman it is just too overwhelming because he just doesn't understand what's going on. So we do our best to keep it consistent and when we can't we do our best to explain what is going on. We do incorporate change also because that's important to learn to deal with but we keep that in smaller doses since the boys have enough challenges on a daily basis any way.

Autism Awareness Day 4

Autism Awareness Day 4 - You have more in common with a person who has Autism than you realize.  It seems that the initial reaction to someone with Autism is that they are different, odd, or strange but the truth is that we all have more in common than you may realize. Have you ever tried describing something to another person but you just couldn't think of the words you needed to express what you wanted to say? Have you ever been in the middle of a conversation and then suddenly used the wrong word than what you meant to use? Have you ever had difficulty pronouncing certain words? Have you ever tried to explain or show someone something and they just did not seem to understand what you were trying to tell them? Well if you've experienced any of these things than you can understand what a person with Autism deals with when they try to communicate verbally. These are the types of challenges they face regularly because communication tends to be more difficult for them.

Have you ever heard a sound that made you uncomfortable or just plain hurt your ears, maybe something like nails on chalkboard? Have you ever walked into a very loud, crowded room where there was so much noise and things going on that it just felt a bit overwhelming? Have you ever been frustrated when trying to talk on the phone while others are talking loudly around you or making noises that disrupt your concentration and make it hard for you to focus on your phone conversation? Well if you've experienced any of these than you can understand how a child with Autism feels when their senses are overloaded. For example my boys have heightened senses so these things would bother them much quicker than it would me but I can still understand what it must be like for them.

The point I'm trying to make here is that even though things are different for the person with Autism, we can all understand them at least to a certain degree. Once we start seeing the similarities in one another it is much easier to be considerate of each other because we're really not all that different after all. Finding common ground is definitely a step in the right direction.

Autism Awareness Day 3

Autism Awareness Day 3 - Never mistake a lack of verbal communication for a lack of intelligence. Just because a person can not or has difficulty speaking does not mean they are not intelligent. In my opinion people with Autism are kind of like someone who is blind. What I mean by that is that a blind person tends to use their other senses to help them navigate since they can't rely on their vision in the same way that children with Autism find other ways to communicate their needs and wants since they can't rely on verbal communication. A blind person would tend to hear things that an average person wouldn't even notice and it seems that my children also catch on to things that would completely escape my attention.

This is why it is important to show a child with Autism the same respect as you would show anyone else. Do not talk about them in any sort of negative manner in front of them. They can hear you and even though they may not understand every word you say they do understand a lot of what goes on around them, much more than you may realize. For example one time when I was talking to John, Gatlin got very upset about something I said. It took me a bit to figure it out at first, but once I did I realized how much he really listens to what we are saying. You see I was telling John that I need to go to the store to buy something for a recipe I was making. Right after I said that Gatlin got very upset and started telling me "NO" and "ALL DONE!" Finally I figured it out, even though I wasn't talking to him or even looking at him, he had heard me say the word "buy." He was upset because he mistakenly thought I said the word "bye" and he did not want to leave the house. He did not want to go "bye bye."

Now in this example he had my meaning incorrect but the point is that he was listening and paying attention to what I was saying. This is just one example I can think of but there have been many times that he's caught on to what we were talking about. A lot of times he gets it right too, he knows exactly what's going on or about to happen. So never under estimate a person with Autism. They are just as smart as you or I, maybe even smarter from what I've seen.

Autism Awareness Day 2

Autism Awareness Day 2 - Communication can be very difficult for children with Autism. For us this lack of verbal communication was one of the things that tipped us off that our boys had Autism. At 3 yrs old when Gatlin was diagnosed he was only saying "No" very rarely and Draiman at almost 18 mos had not attempted to say anything. We had plenty of "tantrums" but no real communication, that is until we (the parents) learned one very important lesson. That lesson was that behaviors are not merely behaviors but rather a form of communication. It's easy to assume that the child with Autism is merely acting out or being a brat but that is not always the case. Now I'm not saying that they don't misbehave because let's face it, everyone does, even adults. What I am saying is that when working with a child with Autism (in my opinion even neuro-typical children) you should always make sure that their behaviors are not in actuality a form of communication.

Once I began trying to decode Gatlin and Draiman's behaviors I started seeing that my kiddos had been trying to tell me all kinds of things the whole time but I just had not been "listening." I was failing to understand their messages. When Gatlin would smack himself in the head he wasn't trying to injure himself for no reason, he was trying to tell me that his head hurt. When the boys would scream and fight me when trying to get them dressed it wasn't because they were brats, it was because I was putting scratchy jeans on them that caused them sensory issues and irritated their skin. Draiman's random crying wasn't actually so random, he had noticed that I was wearing different clothes and putting shoes on which meant his Mommy was leaving him. Gatlin's screaming and crying because I turned on the blender wasn't just him being ridiculous, it was because the noise was so loud it hurt his ears.

Suddenly I realized that they had being trying to tell me so many things but I just didn't get it. At first I felt awful, like a bad Mom. How could I have missed this? Why didn't I see it before? Later I realized that I had just as much to learn as my boys did and that it was going to be a wonderful journey together. I was finally beginning to understand them and the "tantrums" were subsiding because we were finally getting the message.

Autism Awareness Month

It's Autism Awareness Month!!!! That means that for this entire month you all will get to read my thoughts, opinions, experiences, lessons in Autism that I have gotten through my personal experiences with my super awesome boys. Some of you will agree with me and some of you won't. That's fine, I'm ok with it. So let me kick off this month by saying that I am THANKFUL for autism. What??? Yep you read that right, I am thankful for autism. It is true that autism has brought a lot of challenge into my life but it has also brought its blessings. Through autism I strongly believe that I have learned to become a better parent and a better person. It has taught me to be much more understanding and accepting of everyone around me. It has shown me that there are much more important things than keeping pace with everyone else. I've learned to enjoy the simple things and appreciate life much more. I am amazed and inspired by the way my boys see the world and how they work through their personal challenges. I accept autism as a part of them and I do not see it as a tragedy what so ever. I truly feel I was meant to be their Mom and live and love this life with autism. I feel blessed and I embrace it with all it's challenges and triumphs.

Color Cards

     Lately we've been working a lot with Gatlin on colors. He's getting pretty good at it but he still needs some help. So I decided to make him some flash cards and games. I did a quick search to see if there was anything I could print online for free but I didn't really see what I was looking for. In the end I decided to make these cards for him.
     Pictured is a full sheet that I laminated to use as a game board. I'm going to color code some milk jug caps and have him match the colors with the board. Then I printed out two more sets which I will use for flash cards and also as a memory matching game. I think these are going to be really good for him. He was already very excited when we played the memory game the first time.
     If you would like to use my flash cards with your own children you may go ahead and download the free pdf file. These did take me some time to make so please do not post them for sale or anywhere else on the web. I am offering you them for free because it would have been nice if I had been able to find them for free also. I didn't want to have to buy cards because my boys are very rough on things so they will need replaced quite often. So here you go, my gift to you. Just click the link below. I would love to see some comments about how you choose to use these cards. ;)

Color Flash Cards